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Seth MacFarlane Solved My Crossword Puzzle

An anecdote to demonstrate two things: 1) The human brain works in mysterious ways, and 2) sometimes Family Guy isn’t as dangerous as it appears.

So we’re in Joplin, Missouri the other night, out and about to get a bite to eat, cruise the town a little bit and discover just how dark and dyspeptic southwestern Missouri can be on a Saturday. On the way back home, the conversation turns to a foray I had with Windows Vista, experimenting with Media Center extensions and importing all of my ripped music so that it can be played in our game room wirelessly via the Xbox 360 there. That’s pretty cool stuff–for Windows.

At some point, one of us mentions the idea of streaming movies using the same method, and somehow Pretty Woman gets tossed into the mix. At that point, my brain fired several unrelated synaptic pulses at once and a conversation between the two halves went something like this:

LEFT BRAIN: “Pretty Woman? Not really, I can’t say that Julia Roberts is anything to look at.”

RIGHT BRAIN: “I agree with you there. She’s no Angelina Jolie.”

LB: “Wait, what did you say?”

RB: “I said Julia Roberts is no Angelina Jolie.”

LB: “Holy crap!”

RB: “What?”

LB: “I can’t believe this. Seth MacFarlane just helped me solve a crossword clue I’ve been stuck on.”

RB: “What the hell does that have to do with Angelina Jolie?”

LB: “Well, I just saw the Star Wars episode of Family Guy the other night. And at the beginning, they do a spoof of the scrolling text seen in the original. You know what I’m talking about?”

RB: “Yeah. So?”

LB: “Well, towards the end, he mentions that Angelina Jolie appears nude in a film called Gia, and recommends that everyone go out and give it a watch.”

RB: “Let me guess, Gia was the answer?”

LB: “That’s right. Clue: Angelina Jolie role, answer was three letters with middle letter I. I know I could have looked it up, but I sure hate to cheat myself out of a crossword puzzle solution.”

RB: “You’re pathetic.”

LB: “Tell me something I don’t know.”

So there you have it. You never know what you’re going to learn in the next few minutes. And just because Family Guy is sophomoric, doesn’t mean it isn’t worth watching. Family Guy–program it into your DVR. Go. Now. I’ll wait.


  1. XBOX you say? What’s your gamertag? Mine is xSkidmarkStevex, you have me added on Twitter.

    • Kent on December 24, 2009 at 4:22 pm
    • Reply

    Sometimes, after watching Family Guy, I feel I need to scrub myself clean in a long, hot shower.

    …Angelia Jolie?

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